No matter how hard you try you’re never going to be as hot as Jessica Biel.
Ladies, Jessica Biel is here to save you from yourselves. There’s no need to spend hours in the gym chasing the look from her viral white dress moment from The Better Sister.
She knows you’re obsessed with it, but stop it. You’re never going to look as hot as she does in the white dress. There’s no need to “drop the workout routine” or even pretend.
Props to Biel for not playing along and wasting everyone’s time here. The reason she knows you’ll never look as hot as she did is because she can’t even maintain it.
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Sure she achieved it, but don’t fool yourself, you’re not Jessica Biel. The 43-year-old felt the need to remind everyone who keeps asking for the workout routine of that.
“I just felt like I wanted to share that that peak shape in that show is not maintainable unless you are living the strictest, most rigid lifestyle with your nutrition and with your fitness,” she said in a TikTok video.
How does Biel know you’re not going to be able to do what she was able to do? Because she’s not able to keep it up, and she’s not chained to a desk eight hours a day.
Jessica Biel didn’t have to gently remind everyone that they’re not quite on her level, but I’m glad she did
“So I’m currently back on my plan to sort of get a little bit back towards that shape,” she continued. In other words, she’s not giving you the full workout routine, because you’re not going to do it anyway.
Biel went through a routine one of her palates and fitness guru pals shared with her. It’s a workout routine that’s going to leave no doubt in your mind that you’re not on her level and the odds are strong that you’re never going to be close.
I don’t ever want to get caught using the term hero loosely, but this reality check served up by Biel is as close to heroic as a two-plus minute workout video can be.
She’s making due with what she has available around her. It’s relatable and skillfully executed as to keep the “you’ll never be as hot as me” just under the surface.
“I’m tired. My body’s not 20 years old anymore, you know? So I’m adjusting my workout to what I need to do,” she said towards the end. Another “here’s what I have to do, and you’re not me” reminder.
Jessica Biel could have been really, really mean here and dropped the actual entire workout routine. She didn’t do that and for that she deserves a lot of credit.
