People often assume that long-term friendship means unconditional loyalty.
But when one person starts healing and the other resists change, things can turn toxic fast.
Read on for the full story!
I (34F) have been friends with my best friend (33F) since we trauma bonded at a summer camp for troubled teens.
Since then, she’s put in a lot of effort to improve her mental health.
I was later diagnosed with BPD (borderline personality disorder), and I take medication and go to weekly therapy for emotional regulation behavioral therapy.
But she can’t quite say the same for her friend.
Recently, in the last few years—especially since my kid was born—I’ve noticed my BFF displaying signs of emotional codependency that I am no longer comfortable supporting.
I told her I think she’s being codependent and that I can’t sustain that dynamic along with single motherhood.
So when she confronts her friends, things blow up.
She got upset and lashed out by insulting my therapy, saying I’m not a better person and that therapy must not be working for me because “I’m still mean to her.”
I replied asking her not to discuss my therapy anymore since it is none of her business.
The two continue to argue back and forth.
We continued to have this fight on and off until I finally realized I can’t keep my friend, and that broke my heart.
I asked her to please consider therapy because it is beneficial, and I felt like I was growing apart from her.
But when she wouldn’t even consider it, she began to lose patience.
She laughed at me, saying, “Who’s codependent now?” and then argued she can’t afford therapy and that it was rude to keep bringing mine up.
I said I wasn’t—I reiterated that I wanted her to stop using my therapy like a weapon.
So when she started turning other friends against her, she decided to cut them both off for good.
She did not respect that boundary and instead got a mutual friend to side with her, texting me that I’m bragging about my therapy and shoving it in her face.
I told both of them this felt like an emotional attack I couldn’t handle anymore and that I would be blocking them for my mental health.
So AITA?
It seems like these friends simply grew in opposite directions.
What did Reddit think?
Perhaps these friends have just outgrown each other.
Sometimes certain friends just drag you down in ways that hinder your growth.
Her priorities have changed after becoming a parent.
She didn’t want to lose her friend, but she refused to lose herself again either.
This time, she had to do better for her child.
If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.
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